© Bill Farquharson, Print Tec Network

So, Kati and I were up in Vermont skiing (me) and boarding (Kate) when I read her the "Kati and the Phone" article. She screamed in embarrassment, then told me that she should write the next column. I laughed, but then got to thinking?cwhy not? So, here is Kathryn Jane Farquharson?fs rebuttal to my ruining her life?c.

In last month?fs Graphic Thoughts column, I took my thirteen year old daughter Kati?fs male suitors to task for the myriad of lame phone date prospecting attempts. The article was written with a huge smile on my face, for not only was it great fun to create, I just knew it would elicit a loud, "DAAAAADDDDDD!!!!" from young Kathryn Jane "don?ft call me that" Farquharson. To me, the best part about having kids is messing with them, like the time I opened a window on Kati?fs side while going through the car wash.

Anyway, Kati has petitioned to The Graphic Network?fs editor David Lindsay for equal time in an effort to settle a score with her old man. David thought that would be a good idea (and loved the thought of getting rid of me for 30 days). Okay, Cricket, let?fs have your best shot.

The Rebuttal: Managing the Manager

My father tells me that in his family you weren?ft loved if you weren?ft picked on. If that is the case, he loves me very much! My dad was able to see a similarity between the hot guys who try to get me on the phone and the anxious sales people he trains with their attempts to reach their prospective clients. As I read?\and then shred?\the column (do you people actually pay him for this?), I saw another angle to the story. It seems to me that there are similarities to my relationship with my father and the printing sales person?fs relationship with her/his sales manager/boss. We both live oppressed lives. We both have certain expectations forced upon us. We both face repercussions if those expectations are not met. And we both must learn how to manage our father/bosses if we are to get what we want. So, drawing on a lifetime of living under his evil dictatorship, I thought I?fd offer some advice of my own (while attempting to keep my promise to limit the use of the words, "like" and "stuff") to all of the sales people out there who seek to retain their jobs and flourish while making their sales managers believe that they actually had a hand in their success.

Lesson #1: Over communicate?\You have sales reports. I have a report card. Both measure our relative success and answer the question, "Is she/he doing her/his job?" However, they do not tell a complete story. Take Physical Science, for example. Man, that?fs a tough class! My whacked out teacher talks in a different language. The book is full of acronyms. Homework is, as we say in New England, "wicked hahd." The result? I am pulling a "D" into my midterms. Still, my Dad is off of my back about it. Why? Because I keep him over informed of my progress and, more importantly, my efforts. If I stay after school to seek extra help, Dad knows why (he doesn?ft need to know that this cute guy is also struggling and we always seem to stay after on the same days). If I am struggling with an assignment, I ask him for help and act as though he did, even if he didn?ft. I want him to know that I am trying my very best, even if the grade does not demonstrate the level of success he might like. It will not surprise you to learn that I learned this lesson from him.

Lesson #2: Understand the expectations?\It is nearly impossible to hit a target if you do not understand what is expected of you. Dad was very clear with me in his expectations. Sure, we disagreed on just how high the bar was to be set, but he and my Mom made me a part of the process that resulted in a plan for my success. In addition, we have agreed upon rewards in the event I reach those goals.

Lesson #3: Help your manager to manage you?\You have probably heard the adage, "Kids don?ft come with manuals." It seems to me that sales people don?ft either. I rarely hear my father rave about the bright sales manager his working with. Since I am the oldest, I?fm the guinea pig in my parenting efforts. By the time Madeline, my bratty 8 year old sister, hits puberty, Dad and Mom will have this parenting thing down pat. For now, however, they need my help. So, periodically I will call a meeting with them to offer some suggestions for motivating me. After all, I?fve known myself for almost 14 years and I know what works and what falls on deaf ears. By helping them to parent me, I am making my own life easier.

Lesson #4: Demand time?\My Dad is a pretty busy guy. He flies around a lot and puts in too many hours. As such, I don?ft always get to see him as often as I?fd like. So, I have found it helpful to force myself onto his schedule. If I need a "meeting," I call him from my cell and ask if he can work with me, talk with me, or even play with me when I get home. Dad tells me that really helps, since he?fs not a big fan of surprises.

My parents and I have similar goals. Although their definition of success differs somewhat with mine, I understand that this is a team effort. As I get older, the challenges get greater, the boys cuter, and the relationship between my Dad and me adapts. Like the sales people who make fun of their boss, I call him "The Dork." But the big guy and I are pretty tight, especially when I need something from him. Yup, I can schmooze with the best of them. Who knows, maybe in a few years I will go to work with him, learn what he knows, and force him out. Ah, revenge is sweet!

Kati Farquharson is an eighth grader. With her iPod at the ready, cell phone to her ear, and father wrapped around her finger, she hopes someday to attend college. If you?fd like to help pay for it, look into her father?fs sales training program, Get Sales NOW!® at www.printtec.com.

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